Brief Thought on the Plight of the Squirrel

I heard a report on NPR that squirrels are experiencing their Great Depression. There seems to be a lack of acorns, and the authorities are assuming that the squirrels are scrambling to figure out what to do this winter. I can’t help but wonder if the squirrels are concerned about this reported acorn depression. For all the authorities know, the squirrels may all be in agreement that they are only in a recession.

The woman interviewed in the NPR segment owns a flying squirrel (appropriately named Mr. Flying Squirrel), so it seems like she has more access to taking the pulse of the squirrel community. The major concern is that if squirrels don’t have food the food chain will be affected. Poor squirrels. I hope they weren’t listening. I would be bummed if my food supply was low, and the major concern was that if I die before carrying on the species there will be less food for the vultures. What about the squirrels’ livelihood? Sometimes I have envied squirrels – with their ability to scale power lines and all – but after listening to the segment I began to consider the plight of squirrels.

The road leading to my apartment is Death Valley for squirrels. At least every other day I see a rodent who couldn’t make it in this fast world. I can’t tell if there are a lot of dumb squirrels in my neighborhood, or if there are simply a lot of squirrels. I may be living in the San Francisco area for squirrels for all I know. My neighborhood could be a melting pot of squirrels from every corner of the city. Either way, I come across a skittish furry friend most days that I am driving. Today I watched a squirrel panic, and as I drove past I saw some debris in my review mirror. For a moment I thought I had created some fresh road-kill. It turns out the flying debris was fallen leaves. My conscience was clear. The squirrel is probably lying on the side of the road anyway, dead from a heart attack caused by the stress of his local economy and living conditions.